Friday, May 16, 2008

The Mommy Smash

The Mommy Smash occurs when an unsuspecting mother bends over her child for a variety of reasons....tying a shoe, giving a good night kiss, pulling on clothes, etc.

When said mother bends over and the child just happens to jump upwards at the same time it creates a harmful collision called The Mommy Smash. This is blindingly painful because it is so unexpected. I would even venture to say this is more painful than childbirth. Really.

Often the child's rock hard head comes in contact with a mother's nose or lips or teeth. This can result in the shedding of tears and/or blood.

I was recently reacquainted with The Mommy Smash. I was standing behind Chloe and bending over to help her pull up her new My Little Pony undies. She didn't realize my face was so close and she jumped up excitedly. She giggled and rubbed the top of her head for a sec then ran off to play. I slumped over on the floor with little birds and stars swirling above my head and blood streaming down my face as my lip swelled to three times it's normal size. *

I need to start wearing a mouth guard and goalie mask anytime I am around my children.

*Slight dramatization

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Once again cracking up! :)

Anonymous said...

I'm so with you on the Mommy (and Daddy) Smash. It hurts so bad. I've had so many smashed noses and bloody lips. Glad I'm not alone in this parenting pain.

Laura said...

Oh my gosh! I had a Mommy Smash moment just the other day when I leaned over to give Maya a kiss before her nap. Hurts like mad!

Corey~living and loving said...

oh my heavens yes....it hurts sooooooooooooooooooooooo bad. Especially the nose. ugh!

Anonymous said...

LOL...very true and very painful. Ricky once did it to the extent that my lip swelled up! I looked like I'd been in a punch up!

Megan@SortaCrunchy said...

this JUST happened to us this morning!
OUCH!!!!!!!

desilou freebush said...

lolz! I was first initiated with the Sister Smash - my little brother had a head make of granite! the memory of the pain still makes my eyes water. i've only had one or two run-ins with the Mommy Smash but now that I have two little ones I am sure those won't be my last.